Yes, just when you thought it was safe to wade into the deep end of a website with “macabre” in the title… eggplant leaps from the depths of produce horror for yet another scare. Sorry kind visitor, but it is my job to give you all the options for shark week, and this nightshade is proving to be a favorite dinner macabre accomplice. After this, no more eggplant. I promise! For a while… The sausage platform you see- for those concerned carrot-stake-wielding vegetarians- is Tofurkey Italian sausage. The poor victim is whomever you’d like it to be- an ex-lover perhaps, or maybe that Fox executive who canceled your favorite show- molded poorly out of pepper-jack cheese. Time permitting I might have added some facial features like ears and eyebrows, or a distinguished eye-patch.
Ingredients: Spinach and tomato macaroni, milk, sharp cheddar and pepper-jack cheese, Dijon mustard, and a dash of Worcestershire sauce. I prefer to shred the cheese myself because I’m macabre that way, but also because I prefer the texture of home-shredded goodness. Plus I don’t much care for powdered cellulose. Granted these look more like Orca whales thanks to the color of eggplants, but gray is hard to come by in the food spectrum. I could let it rot, but I’m trying to gain followers here. Another experiment you might consider is adding a giant bite along the side of the shark- ala Jaws 2.
ENTERTAINMENT: Mike Rowe’s Dirty Jobs: Jobs that Bite. If you don’t know Mike Rowe, then frankly you’ve been missing out on one of the most gifted hosts with the talent of gab. Call him a man-crush if you want, but he and his crew are always good for a buffet of humor, education, witty conversation, and disgusting feats. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll be darned glad he’s doing that job instead of you.
Check back Saturday for Friday night’s treat- no eggplants, I promise. Hiking tonight at Griffith Park, so no treats posted tomorrow. It’s left-overs night for me.
Be safe when you swim!